The 8 mile melt down and an epiphany

Running and I have no always gotten along. Some times there is nothing better for my mood than a nice run, then other times I feel like a smoker with lung cancer trying to run. In January I decided that I was going to run the calgary marathon again (with a goal of under 4 hours) and then the sylvan lake half ironman 8 weeks later. Training was going well, I was getting my long runs in on sundays. Then I was thrown for a loop a couple of weeks ago, when the sylvan lake for canceled. Thankfully my registration was transferred to another race in Oosoyos, but it is 2 weeks earlier.

Since then my long runs have been a struggle. I have been trying to decide if doing the marathon was still a good idea with the half ironman that much sooner. Since Ben and I are not yet signed up for it, I do not have to do it. Well this indecision has shown up in my training for the marathon. Last weekend I was supposed to run 2o miles (32 kms).. well I got 1/4 of the way and got frustrated with people passing me and threw in the towel (it was one of those running days where I felt like an out of shape smoker). I sat down on the pathway by the reservoir contemplating the thought of continuing my run or turning back. After an hour passed, i decided it was probabaly a good idea to turn around and run home. Well after running 5 miles and sitting for an hour my legs had seized so the way home turned into a run/walk. The next day I was determined to finish that 20 mile run, so I went out with Ben on Sunday and we ran 14 miles. Since combined in those 2 days I got the distance in I wasn't too discouraged.... that was until this weekend.

This weekend I was supposed to run at least 20 miles again , with the calgary marathon 35 days away. Yesterday was pretty crumby out so ben went for a long run and I did a run bike day. I ran a personal best time for a 10k run, then hit the gym for an hour of pounding the bike (since the roads still have gravel on them for the bike). I felt good and had lots of energy. I felt very confident in my running ability. That all changed on Sunday. Ben and I went out for that 20 mile run at 9am. I didn't feel too bad and got past the 1/4 mark that taunted me last weekend. Then we hit the 8 mile mark, only 2 more miles and we were going to turn around and head home! That is, until my legs started aching, and I started wondering why I was running this far since in my triathlon I only have to run a half marathon, and I'm not even signed up for the calgary marathon. Also, I was 3 minutes off the pace that I wanted, too slow. Suddenly those 2 miles seemed like 10000 miles. I spoke up and we turned around. As we started running back I got mad and frustrated at myself. Why did I turn around, it was only 2 miles, that's not that far. Then thinking about how slow I am, and how I'm brutal at running. As i got more and more worked up about turning around and being slow, my asthma started acting up and then the tears came. I stopped on the path, crying. Poor ben didn't know what to do, except keep up the encouragement, trying to at least get me walking again. Being stubborn as I am I wouldn't budge. Eventually I decided to start running again, this time fueled with anger and frustration. I was running much faster than i should have been, but I didn't care, I was determined to be a fast, good runner. I only made it about 2.5 more miles. My legs and lungs were screaming. I was frustrated that I didn't run the 2 extra miles, that I was running slower than my pace. So, of course being the awesome girlfriend that I am, I took my frustration out on Ben. Poor Guy. We wound up walking the 5.5 miles home, and during those 5.5 miles I had an epiphany. If I signed up for the calgary marathon, I could of course finish it. Maybe not in the 4 hours that I would want to, but I would finish it. But I have been expecting too much from my running performance considering I am training primarily for a triathlon. Instead of running 6 days a week, I'm running, biking and swimming. How can I expect to excel at running when I am not concentrating only on running. My goal right from january is the half ironman, and the calgary marathon more of just an after thought. Therefore, do I want to just run the marathon to do it, cause if I do then I shouldn't be worried about my time.

In the end, I have decided that I am going to focus on speed and strength for my triathlon, and cheer everyone on at the calgary marathon. I need to focus on training for one or the other. If they were more spread out than I could do both, but they're not and I can't. I have been trying to spread my self to thin, and my performance in both might suffer. I can always do the edmonton or the okanagan marathon later in the season. Cause then I can focus on just running, instead of trying to squeeze in a long run for the marathon in between my triathlon training, and doing both within 6 weeks of eachother.

Other than my training crisis, life has been pretty good. I am officially going to be finished my economcis degree in June, and Ben will be starting his school in May and will be done in June. Since we're both going to be done, we're looking into moving to revelstoke this summer instead of waiting until January. So as soon as we find jobs and a place to live we're getting out of this city and getting our life started in the mountains, where we both belong.

From camping to skiing!

Well the weather has been all over the place the last few weeks here. At the beginning of march, the weather warmed up and Ben and I decided to test out all the new gear that we got for Christmas. So we packed up our packs and decided to climb up to our favorite spot in kananaskis where you can see the lights of Calgary and the mountains, so beautiful. Well we were quickly reminded that it was only the beginning of March when the road was closed for the winter. We turned around and drove to a campsite that was open close to Calgary, Mclean Creek. We were surprised how many people were out camping with the same camping/summer bug that we had, most in nice and cozy trailers mind you. We had a great time by the fire and stayed warm and cozy all night despite it dipping down to -10! It was really tough getting out of bed in the morning!

The following weekend we visited my mom and murray at their cabin by rocky mountain house. We love going out there, it's so nice and relaxing and you can never get enough of mom's cooking. It's funny how you really do not appreciate it growing up, but once you're cooking every night yourself (and it never quite tastes as good as mom's) Ben and I always look forward for it. It was a great night relaxing by the fire and playing games. The next day we went for a walk finally saw the river. We even got Wilson into the water.

This past weekend was easter weekend, and Ben and I went down to Fernie to visit Ben's mom. We had a fantastic time! Ben's brother and sister and his sister's husband flew out from Ontario, and I guess it's been a long time since they were all together at once. It had been so nice in calgary that Ben and I were debating whether or not to bring our skis. But we were definitely glad we did! We skied on Saturday and it was snowing all day, and we had some amazing runs. But the real treat came on sunday when it snowed 12 cms over night. Even tho it was only 12 cms tehre were places where the snow accumulated it felt like 20-30! If you're not a skier, it is impossible to understand the pleasure of skiing untouched, knee deep, soft and fluffy powder! Well to say the least there was lots of YAAHOOOOS from the group.

In between these weekend adventures we still are training really hard. Some weeks we're at it 5 days and others 6 days, we've just been listening to what our bodies are saying. Ben mainly runs and does hills/stairs which fits his death race this summer. I have gotten to switch it up with typically 1-2 times per week swimming, 2-3 time biking and 2-3 times running (one of which is a looong, slooow run). I quite enjoy not having to run every single time I train. Last weekend for our long runs ben ran a marathon distance (i think this is his third time he's ran that in the last couple of months) and I ran 30kms. Often Ben gets up and runs before I get out of bed, but I always see him when he's on his way home and it gives me motivation to keep going! The calgary marathon is coming up and we should be all set for it! Mind you my summer event was canceled this past weekend, so I am desperately trying to find another half ironman that is close by. I'm leaning towards the one in Oosoyos, but it is an 8 hour drive and 2 weeks earlier. But the only other option really is the calgary half ironman and that's august long weekend, which is also when Ben's race is. So if anyone knows of any others I could consider I would definitely appreciate it!

Finally, little Jack Alexander Bailey-Van Dongen was born on March 7, 2010! He is quite the adorable little guy, mind you I would love to see how they'll fit that name on the back of a hockey jersey. He has totally captured ben and my heart and we absolutely love having a little nephew!